"Feeling confident about your appearance is the first step to genuine sex appeal," says says Eve Marx, author of Beddington Place: Watch Your Back, Cover Your Tracks and contributor to thirdage.com. Give yourself permission to invest in how you look — whether that means a visit to the makeup counter or a new haircut. It'll change what's inside, too.
A confident person is the sexiest kind of person. Knowing your body and what you like makes you the definition of sexy.
After a hot shower, massage your body with lotion, instead of just slapping it on. Or give yourself a relaxing neck rub. "I brush my skin with a soft brush every morning when I wake up," says Mary McGuire-Wien of New York City. "It makes my skin feel much more alive." Natural health advocates believe that dry brushing reduces toxins, sloughs off dry skin, and may help fight cellulite.
Play up your eyes with a new eyeliner, or try a different gloss on your lips. Or, if you normally go natural, put on heavy mascara. "When you feel beautiful, you feel sensual," says Debbie Mandel, author of Turn On Your Inner Light. Take the extra three or four minutes to primp yourself and feel pretty — just for you.
It isn’t really sexy for most people to be with someone that can’t please themselves. For some, this is actually a major turn off.
Having said that, a messy hairdo or a makeup free look can be very sexy. He probably loves the look of you in your PJs at the end of the day just as much as when you’re dressed for a social event.
Closing your eyes when you kiss can be very sweet and innocent. Your partner will probably like your shyness and feel like this is something truly special for you both.
We’re all for those “come hither” looks and making bedroom eyes but your sexiest look just might be your smile. A happy person is infinitely more attractive!
No one likes to feel like they’re on a job interview when they’re really on a date. It’s not sexy to constantly talk about work.
It is sexy when you get to have conversations that engage both you and your partner. If it’s a first date, stick to topics that help you relate to them a little better. If it’s a rough patch in a long-term relationship, stick to something that will get them remembering why they fell for you in the first place.
You are sexiest to your partner when you have an open mind and show that you actually enjoy being intimate with them. Who knows? It just might take on different forms and locations.
Unexpected sex is almost always sexy. Does she have an hour-long lunch break she’ll be coming home for? Is he going to be home early today? Make it happen!
It’s good to dress modestly but if you’re always covering everything up -- even during intimate moments with your partner -- that’s going to become a serious problem after a while.
Ever wish you were Joan Holloway from Mad Men or Eva Mendez any day of the week? Pretend to be them! "It's fun to get out of your head and role play," Marx says. Next time you're in a funk and want to feel sexier, emulate your favorite leading lady, and feel your confidence skyrocket.
Wonder where the sparks went in your relationship? It probably happened somewhere around the time you started scheduling sex as a weekend-only activity. It’s hard to make sex stop being sexy, but this is definitely one way to do it.
On the other hand, dressing too provocatively can make you look very cheap. Few things say “I don’t value myself” louder than someone that has their body completely on display. Ladies, THIS IS NOT SEXY.
There are a million reasons to work out — lose weight, lower stress, and yes, boost your sexiness. Sweat releases endorphins, giving you a natural high. "When I feel low, I hit the gym," says Jaime Sarrio, of Nashville. "I feel strong and sexy after a run on the treadmill or a weight-lifting session."
There is nothing sexier to a man than a woman that can leave some mystery with the way she dresses but then show it all off for his eyes only when he gets her alone.
"How do you ask for sex," wonders Catherine Cardinal, Ph.D., author of The Ten Commandments of Relationships? “You probably mumble it with downcast eyes — couples make less eye contact as years go by. Look directly at him the next time. It'll remind him of the days when he couldn't take his eyes off you."
Staying at a distance or avoiding touching your partner altogether will make you seem cold and uninterested. Remember that most of what we say is non-verbal communication so close the gap already!
One of the sexiest moments is when you cross the barrier of touch with your partner. Gently caress his arm and give him a flirty look. Move your hand to the center of her back as you walk with her. They won’t be able to resist.
Your partner will like that you like to touch them but be careful about how much you do this. Too much contact, especially too early, will make you seem clingy and desperate and there is nothing sexy about that!
There is a difference between someone that can please themselves but prefers to do so with their partner and someone that can’t. It’s so sexy to be with someone that wants to be with only you even though they don’t actually need you.
When you kiss, if you stare at your partner, it quickly goes from being sexy and intimate to creepy and awkward. Remember, eye contact CAN be sexy but be careful not to stare.
If you maintain brief eye contact just before going in for a kiss, your partner will find this very sexy and inviting. It shows that you mean business and want to enjoy it.
They're comfy! They're cozy! They have no waist! But a hot outfit they are not. "If sweats have become your standard after-work uniform, then you are unlikely to feel sexy," says Sari Locker, the author of The Complete Idiot's Guide to Amazing Sex. You don't have to wear fishnets, "but buy some clothes that make you feel sexy when you're lounging, even if that's just a camisole and leggings."